Un fol ding (English diary I)
not interested not interested in knowing what your favourite supermarket brand is i'm interested in knowing what bird sound is your favourite what you think when you're about to go to sleep if you miss me I wanna know what excites your heart, your body why did you decided to live where you do if the nature ever gets so immense that you don't know where she starts and you follow
the present unfolds today in the form of the past my past self is in danger she doesn't exist anymore unless for them it exists somehow in myself it's accepted I'm a traumatised person
I'm a traumatised person who can't scape from it. The pain of rejection lives in me. I reject parts of me. I reject a part of me I used to be. Some parts of me I used to be. they're gone.
It's boring. It's there. It's their friends. It's the past. I don't want it. I don't need to go through it. I don't need to relive it to deserve to say “I tried to heal of this”. I don't have to go through more trauma to recover from it.
There's no reason why I did what I did. Or why I was there today. It's not about her. I went to the past. It's me. I care of me. And that's enough. I left. I said good byes. Especially to my dear friend. I don't know about the rest, I don't think I'll see them. And there's no need for it.
un fol ding